#GYM · LVL 01
Earned a rest day? Lovely. From which workout, just curious?
Motivation that doesn’t hold your hand
Nobody is coming to save you. Move.
Short, rude, funny roasts. Up to five a day, straight to your lock screen.
Free to start · Pro for the rude stuff · 18+
A sample. It gets worse.
#PROCRASTINATION · LVL 02
You don’t work better under pressure. You just finally work.
#PHONE · LVL 02
The feed never ends. You have to.
#SLEEP · LVL 01
‘Sorry, the alarm didn’t go off.’ It did. You were there.
#MONEY · LVL 02
On payday you’re not rich. You’re caught up.
#BUSINESS · LVL 01
Gorgeous logo. Can’t wait to see what it’s for.
#STRESS · LVL 01
‘What if.’ Two words. Entire evening.
#DIET · LVL 02
That’s not a treat. That’s a habit with a nice name.
#YOUR EX · LVL 02
Closure came the day they left. You just didn’t like it.
How it works
01
Pick what you’re failing at
Gym, money, sleep, your phone, your ex. Sixteen topics. Choose the ones that sting.
02
Pick how rude
Passive-Aggressive, Drill Sergeant, No Mercy. The dial goes further than you’d like.
03
Get roasted on schedule
Morning, midday, evening by default. Up to five a day, at the times you’re most likely to be lying to yourself. There’s a home-screen widget, too.
Three levels
01
Passive-Aggressive
FreePolite on the surface. Not underneath.
02
Drill Sergeant
FreeLouder. Mild language. Zero patience.
03
No Mercy
Pro · 18+Uncensored. Full profanity. You confirm you’re an adult first.
Level 03 · No Mercy · Pro · 18+
#WAKEUP · LVL 03
Motivation isn’t late. It was never coming.
#GYM · LVL 03
Membership: active. You: not.
#STRESS · LVL 03
‘What if’ isn’t a plan. It’s a hobby.
Uncensored. You have to ask for it.
Free vs Pro
Free gets you started. Pro gets you told.
- Free: three topics, the first two levels, five roasts a day.
- Pro: all sixteen topics, No Mercy, no daily limit, uncensored notifications.
- Save the ones that hurt. Share any roast as a card.
- A streak that counts the days you showed up. We’ll mention when you don’t.
- No account. No sign-up. Your settings live on your phone.